Week 8 Trash Talk


So if you haven’t been reading BIG MAGIC with us, this would be the time when I say run, don’t walk to buy or borrow a copy and read it — for the next story alone! I am going to give you a little Cliff’s notes version of the story and get right to the message behind it!

Liz tells a tale of an idea coming her way — her life moving in a different direction and ultimately her abandoning the idea for a few years, only to go back to it and realize it was not only no longer with her...but it had moseyed its way over to a fellow writer and friend. The exact idea.

Now I want you to read this story A) because its one of those memorable WOW stories and B) because her PERCEPTION on the story is EXACTLY what I long for, for myself and for all of us.

She could have gotten angry, felt cheated or slighted. She could have thrown a fit. Gone into blame. Said the Universe was against her. She chose door number 2. She chose to see it through the lens of MAGIC.

At every moment we choose what perception we take on. When life happens we chose how to tell the story.

When the cab splashes water on us we can chose:

I have the worst luck!
That cab was totally out to get me!
Well, I guess I was at the wrong place at the wrong time. It’s just water.
Refreshing actually...

Always a choice.
We are powerful creators. We are always storytelling.

Now you may say, “Natalie far easier to not take it personally and take on a positive perspective when it is something small and insignificant. When it is my art, my dreams?” And I say, things are whatever size you say they are. And how you feel about them is ALWAYS your choice.

I can choose to say my dream is HUGE. And that might make me feel daunted by it. Unworthy of it.
Or like it will be difficult to achieve.

I think instead I will choose my dream is JUST THE PERFECT SIZE FOR ME.

Now I can really make some traction. And have some fun.

Liz asks us to ask ourselves, how we look at the process?
Living creatively is also about how we handle the perceived “bad stuff”. Sometimes the most creative way TO LIVE is to create a new response. One that hasn’t been taught to us.
One that seems absurd and unrealistic.
Those ones are my favorite.

Like, making money is easy. Did you resist that?
You could choose that too...

And why DON’T we choose?
Because we are too busy TRASH TALKING ourselves, our dreams, ideas and the entire damn process.

Liz outlines three ways we trash talk ourselves and our creative living:

1) Scarcity

  1. 2)  Self Hatred

  2. 3)  The Universe is Against us

STAY WITH ME!!! I know. I know. Breathe.

First up - Scarcity:

“People convince themselves that they have been robbed when they have not, in fact, been robbed. Such thinking comes from a wretched allegiance to the notion of scarcity — from the belief that the world is a place of dearth, and that there will never be enough of anything to go around. The motto of this mentality is: somebody else got mine.”

Next - Self Hatred:

“People turn the anger upon themselves. I could have said to myself, see here is the ultimate proof that you are a loser, Liz, because you never deliver on anything! The idea wanted to be yours, but you blew it, because you are stuck and lazy and stupid and because you always put your attention in the wrong place and that is why you will never be great.”

And finally - The Universe is Against Us:

“Hate on destiny! Herin lies the evidence that God loves everyone else more than he loves me. I have always suspected in my darkest moments I am merely a fraud. I am being mocked by fate, while others cups runneth over. I am fortune’s fool and she is fortune’s darling, and such is the eternal injustice and tragedy of my cursed existence.”

Now I want you to write your own version.
For each category - what do you tell yourself?
What does it sound like for you.
It will be hard, yet powerful to notice just how cruel you are. And how much you buy into all this trash.
Then wonder who you aren’t further along....

Now.... OPTION 2!!!! A new way!

What if...what happened to Liz, and what happens in YOUR creative life has all been MIRACULOUS!

What if it had all been FOR you?
What if you got it wrong?
What if it were merely trying to teach you? Broaden you? Open your perception and horizons to something NEW AND BIGGER?

You don’t have to believe me.
But you COULD.
You could try it on and see.
You know the pain and suffering of the other way. Why not try a new way?

Can you take your trash talk and flip it?
How could it have actually been pointing to the OPPOSITE?
To another thing coming your way? To abundance? To space for something better? To how masterful you CAN be? To how if you could stop trash talking yourself how you could expand so rapidly?
To how the universe LOVES you and wants you to win?

Try it.
Write out options and possibilities.
What have you got to lose but your old trash?


Jen Rudolph